Lyrics

I Don't Know Why
Words and music by Phil Tittle ©

Verse 1
Everybody that you knew dropped by today
But I didn’t really want to hear what they had to say
So I forced a smile and offered thanks once more
yeah, we praised the Lord and praised you too
but they didn’t know the man just the illusion of you
so I pushed another casserole behind your Fridgidaire door

Verse 2
I left home at seventeen when it got too rough
One apology too many when a thousand’s not enough
the smell of Scotch still lingers in this room
spare the rod and spoil the child
just another preacher’s boy out running wild
I thought about the kid who wore long sleeves in June

Chorus
This house hasn’t seen my shadow in thirty years
That’s an awful long time to hold back a lot of tears
and I’m mad at your memory because it makes me cry
but I want to forgive you now and I don’t know why

Verse 3
I see mom’s picture still hangs on your bedroom wall
The last victim in the story who was bound to fall
I guess dying was the better option since she stayed
a child’s gone and a mother’s shame
her final gift to you was a home for blame
I put her picture in my trunk and closed my eyes to pray

Chorus

Verse 4
The church bell rang for you today fifteen times
The rain settled on your flock while they stood in line
I took a seat in the back and wondered what they’d say
a time to live and a time to die
they got to honor your truth while I lived your lie
I waited ‘till they left and toasted our last day

Extended Chorus
This house hasn’t seen my shadow in thirty years
That’s an awful long time to hold back a lot of prayers
and it’s funny how you’re the one that brought me home
for reasons that sprang from the seeds you’d sewn
and I’m mad at your memory because it makes me cry
but I want to forgive you now and I don’t know why
but I want to forgive you now and I don’t know why